Battle Scars
by Bri KLynn
Summary: Their's was a constant struggle for dominance. Sometimes love is not the wonderful beautiful thing we see in movies. Sometimes it is a war like battle that leaves you reeling from it all, making you wonder if it's even worth the cost. Sometimes love is the very thing that can make you or break you.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: This is my first attempt at published fanfiction. Please go easy on me. I decided to continue this one shot at the encouragement of some people in my life. I hope you enjoy this chapter and the ones that follow. I don't know how often I will update, but I will do my best to finish this story.**

She was so sick of the dysfunction. She was so sick of the screaming, the fighting, the anger, the threats, and the violence. She wanted desperately for it to be over, but she knew that wouldn't happen. She knew that she couldn't walk away from it all, not until he was done. It wasn't like he was forcing her to stay, but she knew deep inside that she didn't have what it took to walk away from him. Even when she hated him. Even when she thought about ending her life to get out of all of this. She knew in her soul that she loved him. That she needed him.

His sharp tongue cut her to the core, and yet she craved it. She loved the verbal sparring. She loved the insults they would hurl at one another. He challanged her. He broke her and he built her back up again. She knew she needed him even when she threw it at him that she didn't. Logically she knew that it was time to walk away before one of them really hurt the other, but she just couldn't do it. He wanted to dominate her, and she wanted for him to do it. Still every time he tried her pride would rear it's ugly head and fight back. It was her pride that had gotten her through the war zone that was her life alive. If it hadn't been for her stubborn need to prove herself capable, strong, intelligent, and worthy she would have given up years ago. It was what pushed her to excell, to push her body to the limit and then to push some more. Now it was the very thing destroying her. She knew that she should just cave and let him have control, but it just didn't work like that with them. She tried, she really did, but he would say something just the right way or she would do something to offend him without meaning to and they would be back at it again. Their life together was a constant battle of dominance.

She usually won logically, but she always lost in other ways. It always seemed to scath them both in ways that weren't worth it. They both would swear that it was over. They would both promise to try harder. Oh the promises they would whisper. They were lovely, but they were lies, beautiful lies. They both knew that it wouldn't get better this time. They both knew that this was what their life was to be until one of them broke beyond repair. As sad as it was there was no other alternative. He was the rocky cliff firm and unyielding; she as the ocean waves that would crash into him relentlessly. Who would win neither of them knew for sure, but they certainly knew at what cost. They knew it wasn't worth it. They knew the scars would never fade. They knew there was no healing from this. Still they fought on. They were both too stubborn, too proud to ever give up. The age gap didn't matter. The fact that they were equals didn't help. In fact it made things worse because neither one of them could ever be okay with that. The need for control, to prove themselves outweighed it all. Even if it killed them they would keep fighting, and it probably would kill them.

What other option was there? He was the most powerful wizard of all time. He had served two opposing masters simultaneously and had still come out alive. His power only surpassed by his brilliance. She the brightest witch of her age. The brains of the Golden Trio. They were the most unlikely of couples and yet they were perfect for one another. They both understood one another in ways that nobody could even begin to comprehend if they managed to figure it out and come out alive they would be unstoppable. It was getting there, and that is why she stayed. That is why she would lie in bed at night, crying her eyes out, or staring numbly off into space so that she didn't have to feel the pain. She stayed because she knew they could get through this, and when they did there would be nothing they could not do.


	2. Chapter 2

In the beginning she would have jumped at the sound of the heavy oak doors slamming shut. Now she would just stand and prepare herself for the inevitable battle. She could still vividly remember the first time he had struck her. She had never felt so alive in her life. When they fought she could feel her power coursing through her. She was no match for him physically, but that didn't stop her from fighting back in any way that she could. She sought to debilitate. She might not have a strong right hook, but she could hold her own. The pain she would inflict was on a deeper level. She knew how to fuck with his head. She knew how to make him hate himself. She knew how to bring him to the same level of mental and emotional anguish that she spent most of her days in. She knew deep down that she was destorying what ever hope they had to having an even remotely functional relationship, but at these times she didn't care.

When their relationship she had been so full of hope and joy. He was everything that she had ever wanted in a man. Noble, honest, loyal, intelligent, and brave to a fault. So what if he was a bit sarcastic and a right bastard at times? His good attributes far outweighted the negative. She could see past that. At least that is what she had thought. How could she have known that it would end up like this? She had no clue about the storm lurking under the surface waiting for the perfect opportunity to engulf them and slowly tear them down. She felt like somebody living in "tornado alley." Her life was storm after storm. She barely had to recover before another storm was there to breakdown the peaceful happy existence she had worked so hard to build.

" Drinking again Severus? Snape family tradition, right?" She bit out through gritted teeth. She could smell the firewhiskey rolling off him in waves. The scent was almost enough to make her gag. She wasn't surprised in the least. His father had been a raging alcolholic, perhaps it was a genetic condition. When he smacked her in the face she wasn't surprised by that either. She had a stock of bruise paste in her vanity drawer for this.

" You do well to remember you place, witch," Severus growled. Even as sloshed as he was he would ennunciate each word with deadly precision that could make your blood run cold. His reflexes were still quick and his wit was still razor sharp. In fact the only thing the alcolhol would succeed in doing was bringing out the rage that was always just under the surface.

Hermione slowly counted to ten in her head. She didn't need this right now. She couldn't risk injury to herself in her condition and she needed to remind herself of that to stop her own rage from consuming her. She was carrying his child and it deserved a better life than this. The little life within her didn't ask to be brought into this world and she would be damned if this is the life she would subject him or her to. Taking a deep breathe she walked slowly to the bathroom and pulled a sober up potion out of the cabinet. She needed to tell him. They needed to get their shit together and figure this out before their child was born.

" Just drink it, Sev. Please." She begged handing him the vial. Holding her breathe waiting for the blow up, but it never came. Perhaps, it was the desperation in her voice. Perhaps, it was the fact that she didn't fight back. She didn't know. All she knew is that Severus Snape was staring at her with a puzzled look on his face. After a few minutes he unstoppered the vial and tipped it back. "Thank you."

" What's going on, Hermione?" Severus asked wearily after the potion had taken affect. " What's different tonight?"

It seemed like ages, but finally she mustered her Gryffindor courage and; " I'm pregnant, Sev," slipped out of her mouth in nothing more than a rushed whisper. " I can't do this anymore. I can't fight you anymore. I love you, but this is absolutely mental. We cannot bring a child into this. I don't want another child going through what we went through. I want our child to have a peaceful life. I want our child to spend every night secure in the knowledge that they are loved and wanted. I cannot even begin to fathom how we can accomplish this while we are together. I want so much to try, but what would be the point? I just want to runaway from all of this and start a new life. I-"

" Hermione, wait a minute. Am I to understand that you are carrying my child?" He asked in an indifferent tone.

" That is what I said, Severus. Not that you care, but I do. We need to figure this out of the shake of our unborn child." Her anger was slowly starting to boiling in her. How dare he insinuate that she be promiscuous.

" I do care, Hermione. It's just...I..." Suddenly his fist slammed into the wall. "Damnit woman how the hell to you expect me to be a father? You know what my father was like. He wasn't exactly an ideal role model. I don't know anything other than what we've done thus far. I know we keep saying we are going to change, but we both knew that it would never happen. Now you are forcing the hand by telling me this. How am I supposed to feel? What am I supposed to think? Can you not see that I am not father material? Did you even think that perhaps you should have taken precautions to prevent this kind of situation? What do you want out of me, marriage? Money? Name your price."

" How dare you, Severus Tobias Snape? You know very well that I have been taking my contraceptive potion everyday without fail. The very contraceptive potion that you brew for me. If anybody is to blame for this mess it is you. The point, however, is not who is to blame, but how we are going to handle this. I will not abort this child. I will not allow it to live like this. The rest is up to you. We can live peacefully and work on this or I can walk away, but ultimately the choice is yours. If you cannot learn to become something other than the bastard that your father moulded you into then I need to know now so that I can walk out before my child get's hurt."

With that the witch turned on her heels and walked away, robes billowing behind her in a way siimilar to her lover's. She let herself out of their quarters and began to wander the corridors of Hogwarts in search of the answers to the millions of questions swirling around in her head like a swarm of bees.


End file.
